Getting Back

I’ve been experiencing such dread on Spanish Class days. Thanks to COVID and other challenges, I slid behind the rest of my group, and have struggled to make up the difference since then. I can handle not being ‘best in class’, but don’t like to be a drag. So. I’m taking as my practice theContinue reading “Getting Back”

enlightened (non)activity

From Tuesday afternoon until Friday night, I slept, then Friday night through Sunday, attended an online (Dzogchen) retreat. Today, Monday, I’ve spent restless, neither sleeping nor awake, neither up nor down, watching snippets of things on my computer, half interested. I should be studying Spanish, but feel blurry-minded. [ Entry: The week of our Covid-19,Continue reading “enlightened (non)activity”

Imaginal

I set out to do a few restful-yet-meaningful things while out on a leave this month. Yet, surprise surprise, found several other rabbit holes instead, all of which led predictably back into my comfort zone of philosophy/creativity. The hook this time, was serendipity, looking into what progress might have been made on a study exploringContinue reading “Imaginal”

The Blank Slate

As you see, bolder formatting is temporarily gone from this site. I’ve stripped it down while making changes, but also to symbolize my current state. In meditation this morning, the theme of faith arose. Unkind thoughts were present – an argument I’ve been having with someone for as long as I can remember… feelings ofContinue reading “The Blank Slate”

One Day

I’ve been rather (overly?) ‘thought’ful in my writing here of late. So much has been on my mind that I’m not sure whether or how to talk about, and until I am sure, I’ve decided to try to work it out in other ways. Retail work has been the most surprising of those ways… gettingContinue reading “One Day”

Zeroing In

So, I’ve been doing shadow work–contemplative work which includes intentionally going into the emotional places I’d rather (and usually do) avoid, and searching around in there to see, “What still hurts?” Basically, it’s a check up. In the same way, I have a shoulder issue which bothers me occasionally, but only when and if I’mContinue reading “Zeroing In”

Fathers, Legends and Queens

I spent a lot of Fathers’ Day watching films, beginning with Rocketman as a promise to my daughter, who loved it so much that she paid to see it three times. Then, wishing to make comparisons, I rented Bohemian Rhapsody., which I’d walked wide circles around before, failing to imagine how anyone could do Freddie’sContinue reading “Fathers, Legends and Queens”

magic in the doing

“I wasn’t doing magic anymore… was just talking about doing magic.” The above is a note I jotted to myself several months ago, and ran across today. It was something I saw up ahead as I wrote it, as though spoken by a me reflecting on that time, once through it. There was a senseContinue reading “magic in the doing”

Beyond belief (systems)

So I’m driving along when it hits me: “Belief systems are effects, not causes; everyone has the wrong end of the stick.” The paradigm of the last decade or more has been to think in terms of belief systems (programming packages from childhood and current environment), then to examinine, expose, and consciously replace outdated thinkingContinue reading “Beyond belief (systems)”

Golden Moments

I felt restless. The beautiful day was calling me out into the flow of it all, and I needed to clear my head. We passed each other in the hallway, hesitating to go by. Then turned, at the exact same time, to more politely say, “Hello.” For five years in this apartment complex she hasContinue reading “Golden Moments”