enlightened (non)activity

From Tuesday afternoon until Friday night, I mostly slept. From Friday night until Sunday night, I attended an online Dzogchen retreat. Today, Monday, I’ve spent restless, neither sleeping nor awake, neither up nor down, watching things on my computer from bed, half interested. I should be studying Spanish, but feel blurry-minded. [ Entry: The weekContinue reading “enlightened (non)activity”

One Such Day

I grew up within biking distance of Fairchild Tropical Gardens, a place ordinary to my childhood which I now consider sacred and a miracle—a refuge in a green-starved city. There are days I, without intention I recall, find myself sitting on a bench under these trees, snapping photos of shadows plays made by their branches,Continue reading “One Such Day”

Imaginal

I set out to do a few restful-yet-meaningful things while out on a leave this month. Yet, surprise surprise, found several other rabbit holes instead, all of which led predictably back into my comfort zone of philosophy/creativity. The hook this time, was serendipity, looking into what progress might have been made on a study exploringContinue reading “Imaginal”

all the little things

When I came out of my first stint in therapy, I had the sense it had been a mere stepping stone to the higher way of meditation I’d begun practicing there. Whereas therapy would leave me drained and sad a lot of the time, contemplative study elevated my outlook and stirred innate playfulness. I laughedContinue reading “all the little things”

On the dark side

Fantastic interview on the Waking Up app: The Dark Side of Meditation. I’ve listened twice so far while multitasking, inevitably missing out on portions, but, this topic rarely comes up. Let’s face it, in our day-to-day circles there are already enough detractors, so who wants to fill the space with downsides? Nonetheless, it may beContinue reading “On the dark side”

The Blank Slate

As you see, bolder formatting is temporarily gone from this site. I’ve stripped it down while making changes, but also to symbolize my current state. In meditation this morning, the theme of faith arose. Unkind thoughts were present – an argument I’ve been having with someone for as long as I can remember… feelings ofContinue reading “The Blank Slate”

Zeroing In

So, I’ve been doing shadow work–contemplative work which includes intentionally going into the emotional places I’d rather (and usually do) avoid, and searching around in there to see, “What still hurts?” Basically, it’s a check up. In the same way, I have a shoulder issue which bothers me occasionally, but only when and if I’mContinue reading “Zeroing In”

magic in the doing

“I wasn’t doing magic anymore… was just talking about doing magic.” The above is a note I jotted to myself several months ago, and ran across today. It was something I saw up ahead as I wrote it, as though spoken by a me reflecting on that time, once through it. There was a senseContinue reading “magic in the doing”

Bubbles & Wings

Today, after a full night of tossing and turning, I felt it… a spark of innocence floating in the air. It seemed very real, yet somehow not of the same universe or substance as the rest. I watched, my inner vision locked in on the hint of the glimmer, as just like the Good Witch’sContinue reading “Bubbles & Wings”

The Summer that arrives in Spring

I do love the sudden afternoon rains, especially when occasionally they stretch into hours. The air turns suddenly cool, the edge off the harshness. It feels like permission to breathe, permission not to worry…