Dear Facebook (looking forward, 2018 –> 2019)

I’m determined to get farther away from Facebook in 2019. It was a break from the site that brought me back to blogging a few years ago, and subsequent breaks have renewed the practice, but ultimately I have ended up sliding back into the default of ‘checking’ Facebook, over and over again.

Unless there are major changes this year, I’m really done.

You know, I wouldn’t mind the time-suck factor at all, if at the end I actually felt closer to those I connect with, ‘more’ in touch. So I can’t really pretend it is a ‘protest’ decision sparked by the new revelations of fraudulent anti-privacy practices.

Social media originally felt intimate to me… as though I could incorporate socializing with people and daily functioning, in a warm and interesting manner. It was almost seamless, also people-affirming and life-affirming in a way that took the edge off of not working in a company or having much family, much less in town. And like endless university in some ways, learning so much.

Most importantly, I felt it brought out ‘best selves’ in most people, including me.

Facebook especially, has since become something else for all kinds of reasons, some of which are deliberate, such as the overwhelming influence of capitalism. We all have to live, and we’re all trying to figure out how to function in the new economy. For some of my friends, social media and career has always blended naturally; each has enriched the other. For others however, branding has replaced their personal online expression and dulled their artistry, or at the least the artistry that reaches me. One feels farther away rather than closer, because the fabulous lives they are selling could be anyone‘s.

Not that I’ve figured that out for myself. The only thing I’ve figured out is that I come closer to “feeling in alignment” when Facebook in particular is minimal in my life. Also, when I’m not holding on to things beyond their time. I can no longer fit that channel into the vision I have for myself.

It may also have to do with it being a mostly closed medium which accumulates people that don’t really engage. So my strategy is: I’m perfectly willing to take the time to go to people’s individual sites, if it means hearing from them.

Perhaps companies too, might consider getting more in touch with people’s authentic, even when somewhat messy, lives? I’m dying to see more from those people willing to share many dimensions, which is different from a few who always seem to see themselves as uniquely put upon. 😉

One good model for the “new vibe” may be Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Empowering precisely because she has determined to be real-in-the-world.

From Instagram

To that end, I’ve already started shifting more toward writing more here, and more dimensionally.

As mentioned in other posts, I’m pretty good about resolutions, so am fairly confident about this one. The only resolutions impossible for me to keep, have been those I’ve had to admit along the way I needed help to accomplish. For instance, physical fitness. I couldn’t just bootstrap or determine to get to yoga regularly: I needed physical therapy to find my limits and learn when to push against them. I needed a real guide.

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