exposure, grief & integration

It began to dawn on me late last year, that I had changed ‘spiritually’ again – that in the way one’s palate develops with age, I had begun to crave new flavors of life, or more sophisticated blends of the flavors I’d been drawn to before. As with food, this often means working with contradictory…

What we cherish

“No bigger than a jelly bean and shot through with a web of delicate imperfections, it wasn’t something most women would write home about. Still, I found its warm, pink glow irresistible.” – Christian L Wright, in an article for Conde’ Nast titled, “How to Hunt for Gems” Christian L Wright wrote the above lines…

Romancing the Woo

I try to keep in mind the ‘decidedly non-woo’ when I write blog posts about meditation or insight, because there isn’t much out there aimed at secular practitioners of contemplative arts, aside from some (great) Zen practices like koan study and Just Sitting. That said, I think it shows sometimes, that I’m holding myself back,…

Forget monkeys, what about spider mind?

Although I’ve loved meditation for a while, I had begun to coast with it, keeping it as mostly a tool behind glass in case of anxiety emergencies. It wasn’t that I wasn’t sitting, but rather I’d stopped exploring with wide-eyed curiosity. No more. I’m having a great time again, like greeting a long lost best…

Comparing ‘Waking Up’ and ‘Insight Timer’

I stepped up meditation practice recently, beginning with using the new app from Sam Harris, Waking Up, but also continuing with Insight Timer. Along with just giving more time. Things I appreciate about the Waking Up app: It is NOT a social media app. There are no ‘rewards’ like stars or trophies for meditating more…

Holding/Not Holding

I couldn’t hold on to the sounds, but I would generate a trace memory of the sound that would trick me occasionally, that would seem to be me holding onto the sound…

Recovery

Flu. I feel so vulnerable during and just after illness, as though my will has failed in a small way, just to show me nothing is in my control…

One Last Time

I’m terrible at goodbyes. Perhaps I’ve never seen one modeled well. I’ve always found it hard to be clear and just let go. I inevitably leave things sort of half undone for a while, hoping against hope that things will make sense of themselves.

sparking joy

To be organized feels like greeting a clean slate every time, feels like unearthing dormant potential. THAT is what “sparks joy” – which she over and over again describes as her central objective.

curses and milennial gaps

Sitting on kitchen counters, we talked about spirituality and religion, especially visualization, and differences between devotion and reification. Then we moved on to politics and gender pronouns, before social media, but especially Tumblr.